The Art of Allowing Others
The Law of Attraction works when we allow life to happen in us and around us…part of that is learning the art of allowing others to be who and where they are in their lives.
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The Law of Attraction is a Natural Law that works all the time in the Universe and in our lives. Read your free Ebook by subscribing on the right of this page.
When we are mindful of where we are and what we want and where we want to be, we create thoughts and emotions that activate the Law of Attraction. That Law then begins to bring people and circumstances and information into our lives that align with what we want. That is the Attraction at work.
Our job is to envision and want and get emotionally involved with what we are attracting.
It is also to allow things to happen. To us and to others.
Please see the Art of Allowing to read about allowing things to be attracted into our lives. This post is about the Art of Allowing Others to figure out their own lives.
Allowing Can Be Challenging
It can be a difficult and challenging subject because it is easier to judge and try to change people than to permit them to be, especially when they are doing something that is counter to our own values or when someone is causing pain to someone we love.
So how do we practice letting Others self-determine? And is it a good idea?
Let's talk about the ways to allow others.
There is the easiest, which is to give love.
I knew a woman who served on a committee with me. She really resented me because she used to head the group until I came along. Then I became the chair. She thought she could do it better. In fact, she probably thought she was the only one who knew how to really do a good job with it.
She gave me a lot of resistance, over really petty stuff. She refused to acknowledge any good, and even said things behind my back to put me down or criticize me.
It would have been really easy to give the same kind of thing back to her, but that is not part of my value system. It is not the way I want to be. Yet, I was very tempted to resist her. And what resists persists, right?
So what I decided, is when she tried to give me grief, I first refuse to receive it. And then I gave her every ounce of unconditional love I could muster up. I poured it out for her. I could see how she was hurting by being replaced and outdone. I got that shewas doing and acting the only way she knew to protect her own bruised ego.
What happened is she got flummoxed. I brought her energy into the light. I drained away her power and her energy by reflecting back energy of love to her. She was left with no extra energy to work with. Her stuff just stopped, dead. It was amazing.
By allowing her to be who she is and sending her love, she had to be different because I had taken her energy
and balanced it with mine.
Have Conversation & Find Common Ground
Another way to handle an energy that does not align with what I want, is to express to the person that I can't live with your acting that way.
“I feel uncomfortable about it. Can we talk about it?”
The conversation could be opened up to gain more understanding. Understanding where someone is coming from, their culture, upbringing, religion, can lead to open discussion rather than conflict.
We can learn from one another. We can more easily allow one another to be who and what we each are by learning to understand one another.
What About People Who Won't Talk?
There are people who act in ways that don't line up with our values and who we can't give love to and make a difference. There are people who we can't exchange ideas and information with.
They are coming from places where they are unable to talk or to share or to understand.
Sometimes we need to listen for cues. We need to be mindful about what is happening. Some of these people need professional help.
There have been a slew of mass killings. In schools, at outdoor concerts, at gatherings of many kinds. In most cases, there were cues that were given before the person murdered others. If we can become more mindful and listen to the cues that are out there, perhaps we can do better at getting people help who need it before they commit these awful and destroying acts.
Even the weapon has energy. It is made of energy. There is physical as well as emotional and spiritual energy in the world. Perhaps we can get to the point where we can deenergize that physical energy with our love, too. It may be worth trying.
I read about one teacher in Florida who gave his life to de-energize the energy coming from a gunman and his weapon. He absorbed the bullets and was killed, to protect others. His life was worth living, to give so much for others. I think we are all grateful for him. He allowed the murderer to be who and what he was, and acted to protect others from the impact that did not align with his own values.
Be the Example
A third way is to demonstrate a better way. Happiness is catchy. We can take action, or we can give a pencil so a person can express himself. Demonstrating something we value and believe in is a part of allowing someone else to be and do what they choose.
The truth is we have no control over anyone but ourselves. It is a waste of energy. We are responsible for what we do. Being responsible does not mean judging someone else, but it can mean taking action that aligns with our own values.
When we have difficulty with a co-worker, perhaps being proactive and showing them shortcuts and tricks you have learned will help the relationship and the atmosphere in the office. Being able to lead and teach may get noticed by management so that they promote you to do more of what they can see you are good at – practicing the art of allowing others to be who they are, loving them where they are, and sharing your love and values by helping them.
A ship without a compass wouldn't work well at sea. Coping and relaxation skills that help people reduce their personal stress and learn better how to attract and practice the art of allowing themselves and others.
When we practice the Art of Allowing Others, we release the Law of Attraction to work to help us Design the Lives we want.
Annie's Tips has lots of posts about living with creative mindfulness, including pursuing art, building love and family, following a life design to have the career and business you want, and creatively nuturing our bodies with health and wellness. Take the time to browse around. Check out our newsletters by joining an email list.
Your life is worth investing in with your time and mindful attention. What are you doing today to release feelings that may hold you back from having an open, attracting spirit? Check this article on Spring Cleaning ourselves, anytime of year and preferably every day.